Bumps in the Road

I try to not use this venue to just vent, but today feels like a good day to do so, so my apologies in advance. Things have been going pretty smoothly, for the most part, until this week when things sorta hit a wall.

Baby-wise, we're still doing just fine. Everything has been uneventful, which is what you want in pregnancy. Other than more swelling of my feet at the end of the day, my health and energy has been good and stable and I've been able to remain fairly active and mobile. We took our infant safety and CPR class, which was a little long but otherwise went well, and now we've just got baby showers to attend to and the big event itself! It's the rest of life that is producing hiccups in the smooth ride...

We had our meeting with the mortgage officer to try to get preapproved, or at least learn how far away we are from it, and left that meeting feeling confident. The only oddity was that only 2 of the 3 credit bureaus had reports on the hubby. Strange... and now in trying to solve that problem it seems a whole new ball of issues is coming forward. After some research, I learned that apparently back in 2008 there was a new set of rules for determining credit scores, called FICO 08, which didn't really catch on. Or at least that is what evey article I could find said... but my bank is using those newer rules and one of those rules is that they no longer report on the credit of authorized users on a credit card as they are not legally liable for the bill. This basically makes it pointless to have someone as an authorized user since it can really only hurt the primary borrower's score. If there is no benefit then why does the option even still exist?! It makes me mad, since the whole point of putting the hubby on my credit card as an authorized user was to buoy his scores... so now we have to switch him to being a co-borrower instead, which is essentially like applying for a new line of credit, which is what you are generally advised not to do within a year of trying to buy a house since it lowers your scores...  Grrr... so much for transparent credit rules... Granted that this doesn't seem to be a huge road block and that were are still not likely to make a purchase until the fall at the earliest, it does add to the the stress of the whole thing that seemed like it was going so well.

Dragon on a Viking ship - or a metaphor for flames shooting from the mouths enemies

And then there is work... I had a horrible day on friday - complete with a good two hour time span of crying and then trying to regain control and process my thoughts into a coherent fashion in order to find a solution. I'd like to blame the crying on pregnancy hormones but that would be disingenuous. They were out of frustation and anger that is resulting in a meeting with HR on Monday as I'm at my wits end at trying to solve the situation on my own. It is no secret that a coworker of mine and I do not get along well and basically never have. This relationship has only continued to deteriorate over the last several months to the point where communication is now virtually nonexistant - and what ever does happen tends to result in me getting yelled at by the other party. I understand that I can be difficult at times and that I don't always have the best tact, but when I already know that someone never responds well to something that I say I'm not going to intentionally behave in a way that makes things worse; that serves no purpose for anyone involved. It feels like the assumption they are operating under is that everything I say and do is done to undermine them, which is false. So far the solution has been avoidance, but when you work only a few feet from someone every day that strategy only lasts so long... hence why HR is being called in to hash out a different course of action. It is at the very least a hostile work enviroment and at times I would say verbally abusive, especially when my attempts to remedy whatever apparent mistep I took are met with verbal venom. I know I've only got four weeks left before maternity leave, but I don't want to come back to a hostile environment when I'm already going to be super stressed just due to the changes in my personal life. My only hope is that I can control the waterworks during the meeting as I don't want it to appear like I'm trying to manipulate the situation. 

As a result of the horrid friday, I came home, ate a whole box of cookies and laid in bed reading for the entire evening. My husband made dinner and entertained Pico all night, which allowed me to try to distract myself from the aweful task awaiting me on Monday. It still makes me all hot and bothered - and not in any of the perceived good ways. I am left feeling drained and underappreciated.  The hubby says I need to find a new job, and in some ways he is right - I could definately benefit from the mental stretching and a change of pace, but I don't feel like I can without him first having a full time job, especially in light of my health and especially in light of our soon to be born son. The stress of it all just makes me want to cry. Things are not supposed to be this complicated, and yet it seems like they almost always are.

These issues will find resolution; things will get better. I just wish that it didn't take such an emotional and mental toll while in the process of working itself out. Makes me want to go back to bed and start over.